Blue.

Its the smell of your old jewelry box.

The flash backs that come out of no where.

The stuffed animal monkey that you bought me.

Its the family dinners that seem empty and wrong.

The color blue.

Old china tea sets, and fruit cake.

Its the picture of you on the fireplace.

The stories you told me.

Why do all of this things need to remind me... That you are no longer here?

Id so much rather forget that all of the bad things that happened.

Its the feeling I get when I drive by all of your places.

The numb feeling.

Its those pictures of us... Before the diagnosis.

Nights like these, when it hits me that those times are over.

Its your three spoons of sugar in my black tea.

Oh, and those pastries.... filled with cheese.

The french poems you read me.

Your kind heart and your memories.

Its the times I remember.

The influence you made on me.

Its the understanding and wisdom you taught me.

And the beauty that you showed me.

Its all this and more.... That makes me long for you.

I hope that your happy.

I hope there is no pain.

I hope that your with me... With each step I take.

I hope I live up to what you saw in me.

Because you are my idol.

And because I still miss you.