Assert.

Two blog posts in ONE day?! Crazy.... But when it comes, it just comes.

As I was at the gym today I started to reflect on myself as a person...

The good things about myself, and the unfortunate ones too.

Ill be the first to admit that I am not the easiest person in the world to get along with.

I constantly find myself at extremes with people: they either LOVE me or they HATE me. There is never a medium.

It gets kind of difficult sometimes.

I feel like I am one of those people that others make assumptions about the moment that they meet me.... Either "I really like her" or "I really dont".

Sadly, its pretty hard for me to shake either off... I either feel overwhelmed by how fast the grow to like me, or self conscious about why they dont.

Luckily, I know that those whom know me best all love me, and for that I am thankful.

But it sometimes makes me doubt myself and act self conscious towards people that I do not know....It sort of becomes a self fore filling prophecy.

I act open and warm towards people who I feel start of "liking" me and I act dismissive and shy toward those who I feel "dont".

As I thought about it more and more..... I realized that I need to work on being more assertive.

Not saying that I am not (I always state my opinion about things/people when I probably should just shut up)

By assertive I mean that I need to stop worrying so much about how I "think" they feel about me and realize that I should act like myself ALL the time, even if I feel like everyone around me is judging me.

If they still dont like me... for me, I probably shouldn't waste my time or energy worrying about them!

I know there are some things I need to work on... I mean there is always going to be room for improvement.

But, that doesn't mean I need to cower away from anyone I feel does not hold a "favorable" view of me.

After all, the people that matter love me through all of my flaws. They just love ME!